Archive for October 28th, 2004:
Howdy-Ho to all of my loyal fans! Thanks to all of you I can eat Ramen Noodles and buy porn on DVD rather than VHS. Wow, what a month for sports. I mean you have the 4-2 Lions, with a much improved high school quarterback in Joey Harrington at the helm the Lions are no longer the four or five win a season team, they are a six or seven win a season team. Hell, if thats not an improvement than I don’t know what is. MSU vs. U of M this weekend! Who is going to win? Who cares? Well I do you assholes! I think it’s going to be a close game. Both Michigan and MSU’s offenses have struggled this season but, as of late, they are fire. Drew Stanton is hot, and Chad Henne is going to be better than Navarre ever was. Its going to come down to defense. Michigan’s defense is one of the best in the nation, and Michigan State’s improves as the season progresses. State has their offense rolling and above all the Spartans have nothing to lose, and U of M does. STRESS’ PREDICTION: The winner of this game will win the Big Ten…This month we have also witnessed history with the Bo-Sox knocking of the regular season-best-record-holder St. Louis Cardinals in the World Series. Boston brought out the brooms Wednesday night, sweeping the heavily favored Cards in four games. This is the first championship for Bean-Town since 1918. Who the fuck is alive now when that shit went down? Bob Hope? Nope that bastard died a few years back. My great-grandma was 12, but she’s dead too. Shit! Fuck gas prices in 1918 was only 6 cents a gallon. Now its up to $2.12 a gallon! Eat shit OPEC. I’m going to start making gasoline by distilling a mixture of urine, orange juice, and Pabst. Well I see that hockey is still taking a leave of absence…what was I just talking about? So the Pistons start next week. Good, like I need another reason not to get laid or get my homework done. Sunday’s are still the best sports days I have. I sit on the couch and do not leave unless I have to eat, drink, or go to the bathroom, once and awhile I play some backyard football and reminded why I retired two years ago. Well I am out of beer. 7-11 is closer than you think. For sports done right have a helluva night. Peace.