Archive for September 18th, 2003:
as i watch texas a&m take on virgina tech i realize that my life is sooo high heat that its not even funny. i have the double threat thing going on today so i’ll keep with that. you know, like my love life (what you think i don’t have one? think again!). the love life took a kick in the nads yesternight for more reasons than none. it was one reason, that being a love triangle, plus one? so that makes four…three dudes and one broad. two of the guys are gettin’ some lovin’, and its “special” lovin’ while there is poor stress that gets the left overs, the kind that are two weeks old, flavorless, and moldy…ewwww. but i have fun and get some kisses, then i find this out last night and i run to the b-room and wash my mouth out 5 million times with soft-and-scrub (with bleach) until my lips bleed off. sweeeeeeeeeet. god damn ya’ll, i can’t win. but i tell you what, i will prevail, and if all else fails high heat life. ’cause its so easy…
So I finally want to add something to this great Sports report that I have made so great over all these years…Well hows that for some smoke up my own ass! I love every minute of it. Now we turn our focus on to the NFL and more importantly my fantasy football league (courtesy of yahoo.com). You see I had the first overall draft pick at the start of the season (its the Skipp Beer League, you wouldn’t understand). So I draft a young man that I thought for sure would be my “gold-mine”…It turns out that Mike Vick decides that he wants to sit out the first 4-6 games with a broken foot-bone-thing. Anyone that knows about fantasy football realizes that I got fucked. And the up to the minute stats show that I am 66 points behind asshole brother Josh. I keep tellin’ him “Just wait to my nigga Vick get back!” And its true, I will win the Skipp Beer League, and I will take that $100 + purse and buy a shit-load of Budweiser…mmmmm, BUDWEISER. I have one in my hand right now. Oh, yes, the NFL, that sounds important or something, well…IT IS! God damn it, thats what we sports fans have been waiting for, well, all year. I can’t get enough of America’s past time. I believe that the NFL should go to a 35 game schedule, thats a game a week with 17 bye weeks. Not bad! I’m on hold right now with the Commish, Mr. Paul. When he gets on the horn I’ll pass the idea on and within a few weeks this dream will become reality. TRUST me! I wish I could eat 13 pancakes. Lets roll our fat-asses over to the Major Who Gives a Shit League…I know baseball is sooo reeeeaaal and stuff, but the only thing that interests me is the NL Central race between Da Cubs, Astro’s and Da Cards. I’ve always rooted for Da Cubs and since de have Sosa I like’em more. Just a quick head note (speaking of head, that sounds pretty damn good, can I getta…) I will be in Detroit this weekend reporting live from Ford Field as the 1-1 Lions take on the 2-0 Minnesota Vikings. I hate Randy Moss. What a piece of shit-fuck-bitch…Now that I have forgone my masterbation, lets drink some brews and nail some hoes…Stay outta the garage T-Bone, not them kind!). For sports done right, have a helluva night. From Georgia to Tennessee.